Faye (0leander_tea) wrote in quod_medestruit,
Faye
0leander_tea
quod_medestruit

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I can't keep that speed, I can't generate that frequency...

Well, yesterday was not exactly good. I mean, I had my vegetable soup like I planned, and it definately helped my cold a LOT. I'm so so so glad it's going away.

But, since I'm getting my period soon, I had massive chocolate cravings yesterday, which sucked, because there's easily accesible chocolate in my own dorm room. I had a nap yesterday, and when I woke up, I don't know what came over me, but I ended up having a little handful of Hershey's Kissables, a little Hershey's Dark Chocolate Bar [like the inch long ones], and a litte Krackle bar as well. I felt horrible for it. And later I ended up caving again and having three caramel Hershey kisses and a packet of Wheat and Cheddar crackers. Bleh! And on top of that I drank last night. Beer.
Miller Lite has 96 calories per can. I shudder to think how many calories I consume in my drinking. But I have to allow myself one indulgence, I think. And mine's beer, because I figure if it's bad for me, I might as well choose something that will numb my senses and make me feel good. =)

Anyway... yesterday I felt horrible. Weak, unmotivated, frustrated, and depressed. I figure I did alright for feeling so shitty. I mean, I did exercise a bit too. I walked about 45 minutes altogether throughout the day from class to class, and I did crunches as often as possible throughout the day.

Today I feel very motivated, though. I think it's because it's beautiful out, I only have one class today, and I've already burned like ten calories [according to Fitday.com] with my boyfriend this morning! =) And this morning before he took me back to my dorm he wanted t go to Wendy's, and was offering me all sorts of food, and I said no to everything, even though Wendy's is like, my biggest weakness, and I ended up telling him to just get me a Diet Coke. =)
Not bad.

Anyway, today I'm fasting. I feel very good about it.

And I want to go book shopping! Anorexics.net has a huge list of great anorexic books, I want to get some! Right now I'm reading Prozac Nation, but to my knowledge so far it's more about depression than eating disorders.

Ooo I just weighed myself. Yesterday I was 143, and today I'm 141! Not bad, still definately FAT. I'm going to go do some crunches. More later.

Good luck today ladies! Remember, a moment on the lips is forever on the hips... ♥
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